


I Guess I'm A Dad Now

by DigitalThespian



Category: Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson
Genre: Cute Kids, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fatherhood, Fluff, Getting Together, Kids say the darndest things, M/M, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-10 04:11:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20521742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DigitalThespian/pseuds/DigitalThespian
Summary: Snufkin needs help with The Woodies, and Moomin is all too happy to oblige.Things go about as well as you'd expect.





	I Guess I'm A Dad Now

**Author's Note:**

> The Woodies have names now, and I arbitrarily decided there's seven of them. I didn't check if that's accurate, and frankly I don't really care. XD  
I guess it's loosely based on this post on Tumblr (https://avril-circus.tumblr.com/post/185450232442/miserable-dad-finally-got-help), but the idea isn't specific to that, since he does end up with the kids in the show, he just.. keeps them in this one. There's five in the post but there's seven now. 
> 
> I'm attached to these kids and they aren't even real.
> 
> (They're real in mY HEART, OKAY)

How was he supposed to live his life like this? He was surrounded by a cacophony, the kind only children could create, The Woodies shrieking as they played—as kids do, but still—while Snufkin sat in the middle of it all.

He tried not to frown, he really did. He knew it wasn't the kids' fault, and while his needs weren't being met at the moment, that didn't mean he should take it out on them. He watched as they laughed and scampered about, and tried to focus on the positive things. They were very cute, and it was nice to see so much unbridled joy in one place.

Suddenly, the air was split by a loud wail. One of The Woodies ran up to him—Aspen, if he wasn't mistaken, but they were all named after trees and were somewhat difficult to tell apart—holding a finger in their paw and thrusting it close to his face. "Waaahh! I got a splinter, get it out, it hurrts!" There was a brief pause, then in a much smaller voice, "please?"

Snufkin gently took the child's paw, reaching into his pocket to pull out his pocket knife. "Oh, you poor thing; here, I'll get you fixed right up. I have tweezers right here on my pocket knife, and I'll pull that mean old splinter out and it'll be like nothing happened." He smiled, unfolding the tweezers. "Now, I'm going to hold your finger still, and it might hurt a bit, but I'm only squeezing so tight so I don't accidentally hurt you. Just be brave for a little bit, can you do that?"

The Woodie nodded rapidly, squeezing their eyes shut. "I'm ready! I'm very brave! I can do this!"

"That's right, you are! I'm proud of you, it's important to believe in yourself." Snufkin quickly plucked the splinter out, but didn't stop talking. "You're very brave indeed!" He let go, and The Woodie looked at their finger with a wondrous expression. "I pulled it out and you didn't even notice! You were so brave and prepared that it hardly hurt at all."

The Woodie jumped up to throw their arms around Snufkin's shoulders. "Thanks Pappa! I love you!" They ran off, leaving Snufkin stunned.

...Pappa?

Oh. Oh dear. He was entirely unsure how to feel about this. He felt a paw on his shoulder, startling him out of his internal panic. "Snufkin? Are you alright?" Ah, and then there was that..

He would happily be their Pappa if Moomin was too. That is to say, if they were together. But he knew Moomin was simply good with kids, he wasn't helping Snufkin specifically, he just saw a problem and knew he had the skills to handle it. So he knew it wasn't to be; Moomin could do better than a husband who was gone almost a third of the year. He looked up at Moomin with a small smile. "Of course, I was just a little surprised. Kids say the funniest things,"

Moomin smiled at him, and he felt his heart flutter. "I don't know, I think it suits you." The paw never moved, and Snufkin's skin burned at the contact.

He swallowed. "Oh?" He looked back out over the gaggle of children. "I think this is rather too many for me,"

Moomin laughed, and Snufkin felt himself flush slightly. "I can only imagine! I agree, I should think one is enough; maybe two, if it felt right."

Oh dear, this was venturing dangerously close to territory Snufkin should not be thinking of, of Moomin and him raising a child together, and they would teach them everything they needed to know, and Moomin would be so kind and patient with them—

Snufkin shook himself out of it, only to find that Moomin was looking at him strangely. "Snuf? Are you sure you're alright? You're very red, and you usually don't wait quite this long before answering." He set a paw to Snufkin's cheek ever so tenderly, and Snufkin was certain he was moments from catching fire. "You know I worry about you, Snuf."

"I'm fine!" Snufkin's voice came out as a squeak, and he coughed to try to cover it up. "I'm okay, really. I'm just feeling a bit off." He felt guilty about the lie, but it was true, wasn't it? He did feel off, just.. not for the reasons he implied.

Moomin nodded, then smiled understandingly. "If you need your rest, I can take care of our kids."

_Our_ kids?! "Pardon?"

Snufkin was staring wide-eyed, and Moomin quickly backpedaled. "That came out wrong! I'm so sorry! I only meant that we're both acting as their caretakers!"

Ah, that did make much more sense. He schooled his expression before responding. "I understand. You don't have to do that, Moomin. I feel fine enough to help out."

* * *

"Why do you and Pappa spend so much time together?" A Woodie had appeared seemingly from nowhere, though that occurrence had rapidly established itself as the norm after Snufkin had arrived in a panic with seven children hanging off of him. How could he leave him to handle this bunch on his own? Snufkin certainly didn't need his help, per se, but it made Moomin feel good that he had come to ask for it anyway.

And maybe he was allowing himself—only here and there, mind—to pretend he and Snufkin were raising these kids together in a much more _domestic_ way, that they were _their_ kids, but that was neither here nor there.

"Well, there's seven of you and only one of Snufkin, so he asked me to help out!"

"No, I meant when you're not doing that! Like when you stand really really close while you talk, or when you sit together when he's fishing, or when—" The Woodie seemed prepared to do this for a while, which tipped Moomin off that it was probably Willow, and he decided it would be best to stop that train before it left the station. Willow had a very one-track mind, he had learned.

"We've been best friends for a very long time, so I suppose I'm just used to being around him when I can be. He travels, and so I try to spend time with him while I can."

"But then why isn't everyone else always over too?"

"I—Well, uh.." Moomin stopped to think. That was a valid point, wasn't it? Oh dear, how was he going to explain this without mentioning his feelings for Snufkin? "Well, I did say best friends, didn't I? The others are just friends with Snuf, not _best_ friends."

"Oh, okay! Bye!" The Woodie ran off, and Moomin blinked. He was still getting used to that, even if Little My did behave similarly at times. He at least expected it from her.

* * *

"How long have you been in love with Pappa?" Moomin nearly spit out his tea. What was it with Birch and prying questions?!

"I beg your pardon?!" Moomin was incredulous, and Snorkmaiden giggled behind a paw.

"I told you! I told you that he's just oblivious! It's obvious you're over the moon for him, Moomin." She wrinkled her nose. "That sentence felt weird to say."

"Hush, you!" Moomin turned back to The Woodie. "A very very long time, but you mustn't tell him!" He huffed, then took a drink to calm himself.

"Why not? You're married right?" This time Moomin did spit out his tea, while Snorkmaiden cackled.

* * *

"Pappa?" Snufkin had grown somewhat accustomed to the moniker, having long since accepted his fate in that regard.

"What is it?" The Woodie was uncharacteristically quiet, and it was puzzling. Maple _was_ sentimental, but quiet was not an adjective Snufkin would typically be inclined to use.

"You're going to stay with Moominpappa, right? I don't wanna have to say goodbye.."

Ah. "Well, if you like, when it's time for me to travel, you could stay here with him! He's better at being your Pappa anyway, and you'd be able to see everyone else too!"

Much to his alarm, tears began to roll down the child's face. "Nooo! Pappa, don't go! Just stay here with Moominpappa, I don't wanna leave Moominpappa, and I don't want you to leave either!" Snufkin was at a loss; he couldn't promise he would stay, he just couldn't. And besides, he could never have Moomin that way; staying here with him would occupy all his time to the point where they practically _would_ be married.

He ignored the way his heart yearned at the thought.

"Oh, you poor thing! But you see, everything will be alright; I wait for Snuf every year, and I'm just fine, see? I miss him, but that just makes seeing him in the spring so much lovelier." Moomin had appeared in the nick of time, though his explanation set Snufkin's heart racing.

Moomin wiped the tears from The Woodie's eyes, and there was a tiny giggle. "You can stay with me, Snufkin needs to travel, and he needs his quiet time. Remember what I taught you about quiet time?" The child nodded. "Okay, run along then! You can come see me any time, okay?" The child nodded again, then dashed off excitedly as though nothing had ever been wrong.

"You're much better with them than I am." Snufkin smiled gently.

"Oh, you flatterer."

* * *

Snufkin and Moomin looked at each other, standing at the door to the woodshed, which was locked. "We're not letting you out until you say you love each other!" The trouble was, they were inside.

"Alright, very funny kids, now let us out," Moomin smiled good-naturedly as he said this, rolling his eyes even as his heart was pounding.

"No! We told you, we're not letting you out!"

Snufkin's voice was quiet. "We could break the door down, or I could try to pick the lock,"

Moomin tilted his head back and forth a bit, whispering back. "But both would set a very poor example.."

Snufkin paused a moment. "Well, we could always just go along with it. They'll have had their fun, and they'll let us out."

Moomin stared at him. "Are you _sure_?"

Snufkin pulled his hat down. "Well, I suppose I'm not entirely sure they would—"

Moomin interrupted him in a normal speaking voice. "Snufkin, I love you."

His head snapped up, and he pushed his hat up, eyes wide. "O-oh. I.. I love you too, Moomin."

Moomin gave him a thumbs up, whispering "Good show!", and Snufkin remembered through his shock that this wasn't real. Moomin half-turned to the door. "Alright, are you happy, kids?"

There was a pause, followed by some whispered conversation. Then, there was a click, immediately followed by the sound of many pairs of feet running off in different directions. Snufkin pushed the door open, but started as he noticed one remaining Woodie. Cottonwood..? Yes, Cottonwood. "I'm glad you and Moominpappa are finally together." They scampered off in the wake of the absolute bombshell they had dropped, and the two boys could only stare in surprise.

Snufkin looked over at Moomin with a wry smile. "_Now_ do you believe me when I say that kids say the funniest things?"

"Y-yeah. I suppose I do," Moomin laughed nervously. This was going to end poorly, he just knew it.

* * *

"Are you and Pappa fighting?"

Moomin looked over in surprise, though he should have expected this from Birch by now, he supposed. "What? Why on earth would you think that?"

"You don't sit next to each other anymore!"

"No, that's—sometimes we don't sit very close, that's normal." It was not at all normal, but a degree of awkwardness had settled between the two in the wake of what Moomin had dubbed 'The Woodshed Incident'.

"That's not true, you always sat really close before!"

"Well what can I do to reassure you that we're not fighting?" Moomin put his paws on his hips.

One of the others piped up. "Kiss!" Moomin gaped.

"Acacia! That is entirely inappropriate!" And entirely too enticing.

"...It's alright; if it'll make them feel better, I don't mind..." Moomin felt as though he had been struck by lightning. Snufkin just offered to kiss him.

"Yay!!" Acacia looked back at Moomin excitedly. "See, Moominpappa?"

"I—but he agreed, doesn't that prove it?" Moomin gestured vaguely, face red.

Acacia and Birch eyed them suspiciously, then looked at each other, then back. They nodded. "Okay." And just like that, dinner continued as normal, awkward silence and all.

* * *

"Snufkin?"

"Yes, Moomin?"

"..I think I'm getting attached to these kids."

"..Me too."

* * *

"I'm back, dear!" Moomin's voice rang through the campsite, and Snufkin flushed despite knowing it was an act.

He stood, embracing his friend and kissing his cheek; it was all the ruse they had devised to keep the kids happy. Enough affection to keep their prying questions at bay, but not enough to be uncomfortable.

If only. Snufkin felt his heart break a little more after every time he had to pull away, after every kiss that just barely missed its mark on Moomin's lips. He had trapped himself in a tantalizing nightmare of his own creation, and it was killing him.

"Welcome back, dove."

* * *

The oldest Woodie, Sequoia, stood before Moomin. "You lied. You only _said_ you loved each other, but you didn't really tell each other."

Moomin was floored. "Wha—how—"

"What else did you lie about?" There was steel in their voice that Moomin hadn't expected, and he quickly raised his paws in a placating gesture, but Sequoia continued. "Did you lie when you said you loved us, too?" They began to cry. "Please don't be lying,"

"I'm not lying, I love you, I love all of you so, so much, I promise!" Moomin threw his arms around the child—_his_ child now, he supposed—and held them tightly, tearing up himself. "You're _my_ kids, I won't abandon you, not ever."__

"Pappa loves us too, right?" Sequoia snuffled, curling their fingers into Moomin's fur.

"Oh, yes, he loves you too, even if he isn't as obvious about it. He cares about you so much." Moomin stroked their head softly. "We both love you all very much."

"Why did you and Pappa lie to us?"

"You put us rather on the spot, and it was a delicate issue; but I confess that I agreed to the lie because I do love him, I love him so much it tears me up inside not being with him, but I'm scared that he doesn't love me like that."

"But he does! It's obvious! He looks at you the way Grandpappa looks at Grandmamma!"

Moomin pulled back, looking at them in shock. "What?!"

"Pappa loves you." Sequoia hugged him tighter. "He loves you and I love you, and the rest of us do, too. And we love him."

Moomin held the child close, his mind whirling. "And we love him,"

* * *

"Pappa, when are you going to marry Moominpappa?" Snufkin choked on his tea. "Oh! Pappa, be careful! You're supposed to swallow it, not breathe it, silly!" Birch nodded sagely.

"I don't know if that's an appropriate thing to ask—"

"But you love each other, right? And you said you come back every year, and he's always waiting for you, you're practically married already!"

Oh my stars, they were, weren't they? Did.. did Moomin feel the same way?

"Snufkin!" Moomin's voice called out across the field, and he turned to see his friend running towards him.

"I'll let you and Moominpappa talk." Birch ran off, leaving him alone with Moomin. He wasn't sure how to feel about it; he didn't have to keep up the act, but on the other hand..

He didn't _get_ to keep up the act. "Snufkin, I need to tell you something,"

Snufkin smiled fondly. "Easy, Moomin. Take your time."

Moomin panted for a few moments, then straightened with a surprisingly serious look in his eyes. He took Snufkin's paws, stepping very _very_ close, and Snufkin's breath hitched. "Snufkin, I.. I want to adopt The Woodies."

Snufkin blinked, not expecting that particular statement. "Um.. okay?"

It was Moomin's turn to be confused. "Snufkin, they're _your_ kids, that—I'm asking to adopt your children, what do you _mean_ 'Um okay'!?" He was obviously distressed, and Snufkin wondered what he had done wrong.

"They aren't _my_ kids; I love them all the same, but they're as much yours as mine." Snufkin tilted his head. "I'm sorry if I offended you, but I'm not sure I follow."

Moomin let out an exasperated laugh. "Snuf, I'm saying I want to raise these kids—_our_ kids—_with_ you. Together. As a family, in which I am their second father, and you are the first, and we all love each other very much."

Snufkin's eyes were wide, and he could swear his heart was trying to jump out of his chest. "Moomin, are you.. proposing? We aren't.. we haven't.."

"I'm not saying we should get married tomorrow," Snufkin gasped softly, and Moomin blushed, though he didn't break eye contact. "..but I would rather like to do so eventually."

"We're going to be a family? A real one, not just us babysitting?" Snufkin took Moomin's face in his paws. "Oh, Moomin.. my Moomin. Nothing would make me happier." The two smiled teary smiles at each other, before bumping their noses together.

"Would you like to go tell our kids?"

"I would, Moominpappa."

"Oh, it's strange hearing _you_ say that; Moominpappa is _my_ Pappa, not me,"

"Well, it's you now. Sorry, no takebacks. You're stuck with me now." Snufkin grinned, and Moomin threw his head back and laughed.

"Yes, yes I am. And I wouldn't have it any other way. Now come on, let's go make sure Sequoia hasn't set fire to something again."

**Author's Note:**

> The kids' names in order from youngest to oldest are Aspen, Cottonwood, Maple, Willow, Acacia, Birch, and Sequoia. I left the gender ambiguous because it isn't relevant, so headcanon whatever you want I guess XD  
Me: I should finish chapter 6 of Snufkin's Memories  
My dumbshit brain: Here have a story about Moomin and Snufkin dealing with fatherhood


End file.
